Run, Zombie Run!

I recently saw the movie Zombieland and it got me thinking. The movie suffered from something that most modern zombie films suffer from and that is Zombies cannot run. Zombies . . . true zombies are undead corpses subject to the rapid decay of death. Rigor mortis would certainly set in almost immediately, locking up joints and impeding muscle function. So you see zombies cannot run, except for maybe within the first six hours of death but not for very long after that

In trying to shoehorn zombie fiction into a more modern reality, Hollywood tries to write zombies as mysteriously infected humans with all the mobility of healthy humans and in some cases with enhanced human abilities. That’s fine for a new species of movie monster. It’s just not a true zombie. 28 days later and Zombieland fall into this category. The creatures in these movies should be characterized more as psychotic humans/ escaped mental patient type creatures.

There are several exceptions of the running zombie syndrome that actually work, one being the awesome classic Return of the living dead. Also the remake of Dawn of the Dead pulls off the zombie hustle. The zombies in both of these flicks are without a doubt . . . ZOMBIES!!

Posted on November 14, 2009 at 3:37 pm in Toxic Chop Suey, Toxic News. Follow responses to this post with the comments feed. You can leave a comment or trackback from your own site.

10 Responses

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    • Andrey says:

      My prioecus, my prioecus decibels!No cake for life? Oh, the humanity!BTW, I was really digging William’s villianious voice.Caffeine free? *shudder* I’ve cut back on my caffeine intake on a doctor’s advice and it’s been hard. Though in my case, I’ve never been a big pop drinker so I’ve cut back on my coffee/tea consumption. Given that in an average summer I drink roughly a swimming pool’s worth of iced tea (unsweetened); cutting back on it has totally sucked.New Doctor Who: I’ve not seen it yet. That is all.The Gaimen episode was . ok. Not great, not terrible.Wait a minute? Fringe is still on the air? Jeepers, I gave up on that after the first season.I don’t think Leverage was the show hitting Netflix (not Netflix streaming anyway) that way. Or at least if it was, then that was in the first season or two of Leverage. Currently it’s not even available for Netflix streaming.Murdoch Mysteries? I’m pretty sure that’s currently available via Netflix streaming.A month behind isn’t too awful for online viewing.I’m with Tony; I love those shows. Even though I recognize they’re not very good, but they are so much fun. And actually, I’ve recently started to rewatch Warehouse13 (mostly because my wife hadn’t watched it before).Alphas is bad? *sigh* I just started watching that and was hoping it would get better than it has been so far (3 episodes in).As long as we’re talking so much about TV shows, have you checked out Revolution yet? The NBC put the premiere episode up on Hulu. I watched it the other night and well I wish I hadn’t.Facebook: Grumphf.If you really are interested in emjoi, try checking out DeviantArt.com; they’ve got tons of those things (maybe even a category dedicated to people creating new ones).BRRAAIINNS! :3William: You say zombie stories don’t impress you much, but have you read ? I’m not a big zombie fan either, but that book I found to be quite good.

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